i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
