I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize