i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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