I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
