I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
