theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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