Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You just said the magic words

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(503): View more from Oregon

They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?

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(734): View more from Michigan

Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.

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(850): View more from Florida

Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????

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