I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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