Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
