i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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