The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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