I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
