no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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