Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
