I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
