I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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