New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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