she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
