We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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