He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
