His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
