we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
