Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
if only i could text you this smell
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
