Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
He has the fingertips of a God
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
