her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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