On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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