But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
