also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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