check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
