I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
