I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
