the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
