let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
