If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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