just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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