some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
