i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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