Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
