just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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