he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
