believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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