Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
