You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
