Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
