just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
