Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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