i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
