I want to stick my p in your. b.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
