You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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