Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize